只能用努力来补偿自己的不足.
自己一度陷入低潮, 生命变得好乱, 没方向感及没动力...
only illusions;
1:28 AM
I don't know what to feel....
I need an outlet to release all my pent up anguish, disappointment and heartache I've been feeling over the past few months...
now I truly know how it feels like to lose something that's very very dear. My throat has been giving me problems since the beginning of this year, and when the doctor diagnosed it as a normal inflammation, I thought nothing of my situation. But over the months, I do feel the difference in the condition of my throat as compared to the past... frequently having dry throat, and it gets sore easily from eating heaty food like chocolate and durian, when I talk loudly, and when I SING...
I went for Karaoke today, and my mind just blanked out when I heard myself sing. Why am I sounding like this? why can't I hit the right notes? why is my voice like that? These were all the questions running through my head... I felt like CRYING!
Dear Lord, I do not ask for much. Please, please do not take away something so dear from me. I need my throat, I need my voice, because singing is something I know very best that I enjoy doing over anything else.
:(
only illusions;
1:16 AM
RANDOM FB MOMENTS ON A BORING DAY
Superman has found a street to his name in Dim Sum land... poor dude is suffering from the terribly cold and windy weather now...
and this....... sums up my life as a student in RP back then, HAHA!
it has been about 3 weeks into my holiday and boredom has started to kick in, camping on FB and Twitter have seem to turn into a daily affair, and of course, the drama queen in me never dies. I actually managed to finish watching 3 drama serials in a week, amazing much? haha! I was pretty amazed by my own ability to stay in front of the laptop for such long hours every day, i guess it's time to invest in some eye supplements, LOL!
I also took some time to plan for my vacation trips for this year, and I find myself being caught in a serious dilemma =/ Sydney or Korea??
Korea has been a place I've wanted to visit over the past few years, not to chase idols-.- but to go for some great shopping! I guess over the years, brands like Etude House and The Face Shop has indeed managed to get themselves rooted in Singapore. I'll be able to get the same products at like half price in Korea?! Having been watching Korean variety programmes lately, I can imagine myself in Dongdaemun shopping the WHOLE DAY as well, HAHA! what's more, family and friends are seriously planning for a trip this coming June!
My primary school friend has been asking me to pay a visit to Sydney year after year after year... we always find ourselves talking about what we will do if I get there, however, after all these years, all these thoughts have remained as thoughts, HAHA! let me see, she migrated over there in 2002, so it has been 8 years since she fist asked me to pay a visit but I've yet to do so. Furthermore, we'll all be celebrating our 21st birthday this year, so the few close friends have been telling me its a good time to go over for a road trip together and enjoy the winter in June together... JUNEEEEEEE!
it's really very hard to come to a decision because I wish I could be in both places.. Greedy as I am, I know I can only choose one :( I was all for Korea just 2 months back, but now, I think I'm swaying towards the road trip, HAHA!
FRIENDS, YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE GREATLY APPRECIATED ^^
my friends were teasing me, that 2010 was an "island year" for me as I visited Krabi and Bintan... and they say it seems that I've planned a "city year" in 2011 with intentions to visit Sydney and Korea, HAHAHA! oh well, if this cycle repeats itself, hopefully I'll be able to step foot on Maldives in 2012! :)
only illusions;
12:37 PM
SOME TIMES, JUST SOME TIMES............
I feel like I emphasize too much on inter-relationships with people around me. So much so that it hurts me when people whom I hold on dearly to make me feel that they don't actually care.... Maybe I'm too sensitive (I can't expect friends to ALWAYS be there, wherever, whenever), but being brought up in such a way where I'm taught to always be there for other people, that in life, kinship and friendship is very important, it stings on my heart when I don't see my friends putting in effort to keep the friendship going...
one thing my friends always tell me... "eh, you don't angry leh", SERIOUSLY, next time you guys have that thought again, I'm telling you now, I'M NOT..... I'm not angry, I'm just upset... upset that a little bit of your time can't be taken up to meet up with this old friend of yours... upset because I'm someone who truly, seriously, wholeheartedly care for whomever calls yourself my friend, but I don't see that reflection in you.........
Maybe time has changed, and I'm not living up to it.... perhaps I'm more suitable to just live in isolation, haha....
=/
only illusions;
9:29 PM
SCHOOL'S OUT! ^^
with the blink of an eye, one trimester has came and gone just like that... it was pretty much of a whirlwind over the past 3 months... picking up a totally new field of study, making many new great friends, having lots of assignment to rush, meeting deadlines, mugging for examinations, attempting to adapt to all the changes going on all at one go, and most importantly, learning to live my life without having to depend on Superman for every little thing...
A sudden change of tempo to my life after leading an idyllic one for almost a year was not easy to cope with, but after gaining momentum, I realized this change is definitely worth the while :) I truly enjoy going to school now... gone with the Genevieve who used to dread going to school every other day, HAHA! One of my lecturers once told us to "follow your bliss", at that moment, I just thought to myself, "I think I've found mine already"... I've no regrets taking up Psychology!! ^^
I've a good feeling about 2011.......... it's gonna be a good year ahead! :D
only illusions;
8:39 PM
School's been pretty nice to me so far, despite the sometimes crazy assignment deadlines, having to hand in everything in the same week and the pretty screwed system at times.... Met many nice people in JCU... it's thanks to them for making uni life a less taxing one :)
and also not to forget, funny lecturers to spice up the ever boring and dry lectures, haha! just look at what my dear lecturer wrote on the board on the day of sociology mock exam -.-
it's amazing how time flies.. one trimester has passed just like that, and it's time for us to start mugging for our final exams... it feels like yesterday when I just stepped into the school building at 600, Upper Thomson Road... lol... all in all, it's time to fight the inertia and get my engine started to prepare for this final lap, jiayou! :)
only illusions;
10:55 AM
HO HO HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D
Spent my Christmas with the dearest poly mates at Studio M hotel this year :) it was something novel as it's my first time in 20 years stepping into a hotel room in my home country, haha! had lots of fun and had our great share of laughter throughout the night, welcoming boxing day with our arms stretched out wide, lol!
We were quite surprised when we stepped into the hotel, ready to go check in. What greeted us was a long line of people, waiting to be checked in as well.. recent trend of Singaporeans celebrating festive seasons in hotel?? HAHAHA!
spot the stairs? this is the mezzanine concept of the room, where the bed is located directly above the entrance...
girls talk-ing the night away :)
the bed's so comfy and nice, we started our mini "photoshoot" session, hahah! now i know what it feels like to be a star... TIRING! period.
a shot from downstairs...
group photo! attendance in check, haha...
the guys who always cracks us up :)
With Christmas having came and gone, it's now time to embrace the New Year with open arms :) I had a good 2010, and am looking forward to have a blast in 2011 ^^
only illusions;
12:24 PM
